Joy and Longing in Advent

When the December edition of Third Third Life is published, we will have begun the season of Advent, a special time of waiting and hoping, a time of preparation for the coming of Christ, a time for both gravity and joy. Though Advent has a solemn quality, joy is one of Advent’s key attributes. In fact, traditional liturgical celebrations of Advent focus on joy on the third of the four Sundays in Advent. This joy is associated with the birth of Christ and his future coming. Some churches call the third Sunday of Advent “Gaudete Sunday,” using the Latin word gaudete, which means “Rejoice!”

Joy in Advent is mixed in with solemnity. Advent is meant to be a season for penitence, a time to be sorry for our sins and turn from them. It’s a time to pay attention to our broken world that is so much in need of salvation and renewal. Advent stirs up in us a longing for the one who saves, for Jesus Christ, whose first coming defeated the power of sin and death, and whose second coming will bring the fullness of God’s kingdom to the world. So, even when we feel Advent joy, it’s mixed with longing.

That’s what I’d like to reflect on in this article, namely, the relationship of joy and longing in Advent and in the third third season of life. This relationship turns out to be more nuanced than we might at first imagine. Awareness of the nuances not only helps us experience joy, but also enables us to grow in our relationship with the Lord.

Longing for Joy

In my research on joy, I discovered a book called Longing for Joy: An Invitation Into the Goodness and Beauty of Life by Alastair Sterne. I immediately resonated with the title of this book because I do long for joy. I expect you do too. So much of life these days feels heavy, even sad. We can be weighed down with anxiety, discouragement, and depression. In such a time as this, it would be a precious gift to experience joy. It’s something for which we long.

According to Alastair Sterne, joy is “tricky to define.” He explains, “We can’t easily distinguish joy from “love, gratitude, hope, contentment, and peace” (p. 14). Nevertheless, Sterne writes, “Joy is an emotion that arrives as our lives are apprehended by goodness or beauty. This is joy, reluctantly defined” (p. 15).

The connection between goodness and joy, as seen in Sterne’s definition, is one of the few things that scholars who study joy tend to agree upon. Dr. Robert A. Emmons, professor emeritus at the University of California, Davis, observes in an article on joy.

“Almost all descriptions of joy in [theological literature on joy] state that joy is a response to a ‘good’ object– usually a positive event or circumstance. Different from mood states, joy as an emotional state is always about something, and usually, this is news about something good in one’s life. Joy is a response to some good object.”

Thus, when we long for joy, we’re not longing merely for a positive emotion. Rather, we’re longing for the goodness that undergirds and animates our joy.

Longing as an Aspect of Joy

Longing, as it turns out, is not something separate from joy. It’s not just a strong desire for joy. Rather, longing is somehow an aspect of joy, something inherent to joy.

Longing is somehow an aspect of joy, something inherent to joy.

C.S. Lewis emphasized the necessary connection between longing and joy in his writings. For example, in Surprised by Joy: The Shape of My Early Life, Lewis writes, “Joy is distinct not only from pleasure in general but even from aesthetic pleasure. It must have the stab, the pang, the inconsolable longing.” Did you catch that? Not only do we long for joy, but joy itself must have “the inconsolable longing” embedded within it. Lewis defines joy, not as a deeper and more lasting version of happiness, but rather as “an unsatisfied desire which is itself more desirable than any other satisfaction.”

Alastair Sterne describes joy similarly, acknowledging his dependence on Lewis. In contrast to “portraits of joy that focus exclusively on her lightheartedness,” Sterne proposes that “A more accurate portrait of joy includes the pang—the inconsolable longing and unsatisfied desire that accompanies her.” This longing, according to Sterne, comes especially after we experience joy.

In the aftermath of joy, we see that she mingles not only with our heart and soul but also with this deep longing we struggle to name. The longing that we set out to fulfill, the longing that never really ends, the longing that joy surfaces and enlivens and leaves with us. The experience of joy and our longing for joy are almost like seeing the same person from different angles.

It seems that, for Sterne, the longing we feel is associated with but somewhat distinct from joy. That longing comes, not in the experience of joy so much as “in the aftermath.” Nevertheless, experiencing joy and longing for joy are, in Sterne’s view, almost inseparable if not the same thing.

Joy Mixed with Longing in the Season of Advent

Advent is a season when we experience the interweaving of joy and longing. As I noted earlier, Advent is a time for looking to the future. We get in touch with our longing for the coming of Christ and the fullness of God’s kingdom. Yet, in the middle of our hope-filled Advent longing, we pause to rejoice on Gaudete Sunday. There it is, joy in the midst of longing.

There are other ways we experience joy and longing in Advent and in our celebrations of Christmas. Let me offer an example from my own life.

I’ve become rather famous (infamous?) among my friends and neighbors for my excessive passion for Christmas lights. Each year, during the four weeks of Advent and extending through the twelve days of Christmas, my front yard is decorated with bright, colorful lights. And not just a few of them. In fact, each year I put up more than 8,000 lights. Yes, that’s the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help me God.

As I create my yearly light display, I feel more than momentary happiness. Oh, I’m glad for the beauty of my lights and the chance to serve my neighbors, who love to come by and gaze upon them. Moreover, I’m delighted to be entering one of my favorite times of the year. But, more deeply, every time I put up my lights, I joyfully remember how such things enchanted me when I was a child. Even more, I remember my mother, who LOVED Christmas decorations. And then I remember the first time I felt strangely moved to put up way more lights than I had ever put up before. It was in December 2016, only days after my mother died. At that time, my wise wife helped me see that I was putting up so many lights as a way to honor my mom and grieve over her death. So, years later, as I’m putting up my lights, my joy is mixed with a vigorous longing to see my mother again. I want to tell her about the lights and how they honor her memory. I want her to know how much I am like her when it comes to a passion for Christmas decorations. In these moments of peculiar joy as I put up my lights, I long for heaven in a way I rarely do in normal life.

Joy of Every Longing Heart

Though C.S. Lewis, perhaps more than anyone in recent times, has helped us understand the intermingling of joy and longing, another Englishman made that connection two centuries before Lewis did. I’m talking about Charles Wesley, brother of John Wesley, the founder of Methodism. Charles Wesley wrote thousands of hymns, including such favorites as “O for a Thousand Tongues to Sing,” “And Can It Be That I Should Gain,” “Christ the Lord is Risen Today,” and “Hark, the Herald Angels Sing.” He also wrote a hymn that is one of the few featured in Advent worship, “Come, Thou Long Expected Jesus.” In this hymn, we find a profound and unique combination of joy and longing.

Wesley’s hymn is a prayer addressed to Jesus, specifically to “Thou long-expected Jesus.” The “long-expected” phrase points to Israel’s ancient hope for an anointed one who would “set [his] people free.” The messiah would be “Israel’s strength and consolation,” to be sure. But he would not be only for Israel. Rather, the long-expected messiah, whom we know as Jesus, would release us “from our fears and sins.” He would be the “hope of all the earth” and the “dear desire of every nation.”

Then, the last line of the first stanza of “Come, Thou Long Expected Jesus” addresses Jesus as “joy of every longing heart.” There you have it, joy and longing bound together once again, yet in a unique relationship. Here, longing isn’t just an element of joy. And joy doesn’t only lead to longing. Rather, Jesus IS “the joy of every longing heart.”

Here, longing isn’t just an element of joy. And joy doesn’t only lead to longing. Rather, Jesus IS “the joy of every longing heart.

What does this mean? In the context of Wesley’s hymn, Jesus is the one who fulfills our deepest longings. In so doing, he fills us with joy. What exactly does Jesus do for us, according to the hymn? In the first stanza:

• Jesus sets us free from all that binds us.
• He releases us from our fears and sins.
• He gives us true rest.
• He is the hope of all the earth.

Then, in the second verse:

• Jesus delivers not only the Jewish people, but us as well.
• He reigns in us forever.
• He enables us to experience his “gracious kingdom” even now.
• Through his Spirit, he reigns in our hearts.
• And, by his merit, he will one day raise us to his “glorious throne.”

This prosaic version of Wesley’s poem helps us grasp many of the ways in which Jesus satisfies our longings, thus filling us with joy. In a poetic sense, therefore, we might say with Wesley that Jesus is our joy.

For What or Whom are You Longing in this Season of Life

Please allow me to ask you a personal question: For what or for whom are you longing in this season of life? By “this season,” I mean “in the season of Advent” and “in the third third of your life.” Perhaps I might ask my question in a little different way: How does being in the third third of life affect your Advent longings?

How does being in the third third of life affect your Advent longings?

I already shared one way I answer this question. Because of how my Christmas lights remind me of my mother, I find myself longing for heaven in a different way than I usually do. (And, yes, I am also looking forward to being with Jesus. But sometimes this longing is, for me, more theological than emotional. I expect that one day this will be different.)

Also, Advent helps me get in touch with my longing for God’s kingdom, along with its righteousness, justice, and peace. This happens when I hear one of the most common Advent readings. In Isaiah 9, it says:

The people who walked in darkness
have seen a great light;
those who lived in a land of deep darkness—
on them light has shined.
You have multiplied the nation,
you have increased its joy;
they rejoice before you
as with joy at the harvest,
as people exult when dividing plunder.

For a child has been born for us,
a son given to us;
authority rests upon his shoulders;
and he is named
Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.
His authority shall grow continually,
and there shall be endless peace
for the throne of David and his kingdom.
He will establish and uphold it
with justice and with righteousness
from this time onward and forevermore.
The zeal of the LORD of hosts will do this (9:2-3, 6-7).

In so many ways, it seems the me that we are a people walking in darkness in need of God’s light. We need the joy God alone can give us. We need to live under the authority of the one who is Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, and Prince of Peace. Yes, we need the endless peace that he alone can give us. We need the justice and righteousness that come with his kingdom. We need it now and forevermore.

As I talk with people in the third third of life about their longings, I hear their desires for their own lives, for those they love, and for the world. They often talk in the language of Isaiah 9, especially as they think about what their grandchildren will experience in the future. They long for God’s kingdom, righteousness, justice, and peace. But I also hear something else, not only a desire for God’s kingdom, but also a desire to know God better. People in the third third long for the joy of the age to come. But they are also longing for Jesus, the joy of every longing heart. They yearn to know Jesus more truly, more deeply, more intimately.

Conclusion

So, in this season of Advent, may you experience the joy of the Lord. As you rejoice, may you also long for God’s kingdom. As you long, may you experience the joy of God’s promise and presence. Plus, may come to know Jesus more deeply and truly, Jesus, the joy of every longing heart, including yours. Amen.